14 year search for husband's military records..........

2nd time's a charm....I got half way through this and it disappeared.

check this pix out below (Self) Info on deceased husband's military records......He certainly did not write this....


Source: U.S.
Department of Veterans Affairs


let me tell you why.

I accidentally came across this site.
I was looking on Facebook at a post someone replied to ...........when all of a sudden the name "Tony H." came in my head.............There is only one and he was an old boyfriend in 9th grade. I've haven't thought of him for years. He was a good kisser!!! (this is off topic but brings me to the next FIND!

I am searching and came across a cemetery website.....my husband is listed and it also acknowledges that he was in service. .......

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What cracks me up is that the source is..........



Source: U.S.
Department of Veterans Affairs

Veteran Military Branch	US ARMY
Veteran War(s)	Vietnam

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Here's 14 years condensed.

A couple years before he dies he says he needs to tell me something. (married 21yrs at that point)

He asks me to sit down on the bed (I'm in the bedroom putting away folded clothes)
He says..............."I was in Viet Nam"
WHAT? I ask
"Viet Nam"

when? where?

He's starting to cry.... My husband never cried.

He said he would not talk about it again and he was right!
One day a couple of weeks later I was searching on the only internet we had WEBTV. and found him and his military records on this site.
I should have printed the page and copied the website but I didn't . I emailed them asking for information about my husband's service.
The next day the info on my husband was GONE!

I told the family because I wanted more info but they did not believe him. They do not remember him being gone a long time.
And he wasn't ... only to get POW's out.

Tom told me that when they were done with him they physically dropped him off in San Francisco, stripped him of all ID and he had to hitch-hike home some 462 miles.

After he died a couple years later I searched solid for 2 years for records. Proof that he was there; because no one would believe him or me.
He had an older brother who was in Viet Nam and he didn't believe him only because he thought he was the only one in the family who was in the service. (ego trip)
Then on the third year I contacted Washington DC and asked for a certain dept. involved in issuing headstones. I was in contact with an older man who asked me to mail him what I had.
I did..........didn't hear from him so I called him and he said the records must have been lost. So he asked me to mail them directly to him and he would make sure he would personal hand deliver them to the right person. I got a letter the first part of the year and just tossed it to the side because I felt it was the same "old" NO I was always getting back in the mail.
So one day I grabbed that letter and to my surprise......................it said "you have been approved for a headstone but we need additional information. You have the rank wrong.
I was ecstatic!! I could not believe what I was reading. So I called her....
I said ......... "how is it that I you are giving me a headstone, I've been denied any information for two years.
"We have information in our office that states your husband was seen by a doctor while in Viet Nam"
"OMG Really" that's wonderful.

She said the headstone would be coming in a few weeks.

With that good news I keep up my search for more information and records to prove my husband was there. (I should have asked them for that documentation of him being seen by Dr.)
Maybe I did but they could not give it to me. I can't remember.

After a couple more years; I think it was more like 2009. I called the woman back. Not the one who I spoke to but her supervisor....... I wanted to go to the top in that dept.
I asked her.....if you gave me my husband's headstone why can't I get records proving my husband was there from St. Louis.

She said..........and I quote........." If you were to try and get a headstone now we would not be able to give you one"
"Why"? I asked.
"Because his records are no longer here, they have been removed.
What!

Things have never come easy for me in the past.

hopeless

There you have the short story of it all.

So to see this today online was a shock.
Shame on the US GOVERNMENT FOR BEING SO CROOKED.

Oh....the older brother....he threatened me and said that if I put Tom's headstone on his grave that he would rip it off. To this day it still sits in my livingroom and Harold died in 2008.
But he came to me at the James Van Praagh event and was standing behind me with my husband So he now believes Tom and Tom has forgiven his brother.... just as I had.



again..........
What cracks me up is that the source is.......... Source: U.S.
Department of Veterans Affairs

So the right person is out there with the information I need to find my husband's military records...........

But working where I am today I was told by a security guard that I have been asking the wrong way all these years.
I don't' want to ask for records........(those are confidential) I only want proof that he served so that I can get his benefits.

Sure that would be nice but my main reason was to prove to the family that he was there....but as his brother-in-law found out after he died in 08' Tom was right.
I don't need to prove anything.....they will all find out.


to Tom.


One of my book chapters for sure LOL

by the way.........4/16 is his birthday (husband)

I can understand your frustration. Proving army records is very hard as I found from my husband's time in Korea.
He was British born but visited Australia in 1949. Decided to stay there (much easier in those days,no visa required if working) which he was.
He joined the Australian army on a whim and did service in Korea. Luckily for him and myself,he kept his army records but I never thought to claim a Vets dependant pension until someone from the Australian Vets Assoc. contacted me and asked me if I would like to claim one.
Luckily for me,I visited the Vets RSL Assoc. in Melbourne (like our British Legion) when on holiday there. I was asked if I had received any notice of claim for war pension. I answered 'No',I had never received any paperwork at all.
The Assoc. in Melbourne immediately put in a claim for me and I was awarded an excellent Vets. Dependant Pension.
I couldn't live on the OAP pension here,that war pension literally keeps me in the UK.

By the way,my husband fought along side the Americans during that war and made many friends while there.
Always had the utmost respect for all American people.

I am so pleased you fought that war to claim what you rightly deserve.

So many young men served in Korea and Vietnam giving their lives for others.



Joan

That's great Joan, happy to hear you received yours.
I'll be searching for a long time it seems. They won't cough up any records for it. Unfortunate how our service men respond to the call of duty for our country and then are shoved in the dark as thought they never existed.

My husband in a reading once said that the records are buried very deep. But Spirit told me in a reading once....never give up.

My dad was in Korea and he met my mother after moving to the US during the depression. My dad was from Belfast. My mother Canada.

Thank you for sharing your story Joan.

Did your husband have any 'demob' papers? Luckily,when wounded and healthy again,he was flown back to NSW.
He immediately put in for Demob,granted it and flew back to the UK.
But he was automatically given his papers.
I had to produce every bit of evidence I had to get that pension. luckily my son was still in Oz as I was in the UK so he was a sort of a go between.
But to witness who I was,on a personal level,I had to travel to Australia,open an Australian bank account so the pension could be paid in there.
They would not even transfer it to an English bank.....
I was furious!

Joan xxx

Deb, he had to be quite young when he was in the service, maybe he lied about his age to get accepted. My FIL did that for WWII and it caused problems when my MIL needed information for his Veterans Funeral and Burial. We finally figured it out because Ken remembered something his dad had told him. He went in at 17 and lied about his age. What year did he enter?

Joan, I'm glad you got what you deserved, my MIL finally has too.

Joan, that was expensive to acquire. Red tape we call it.
No they stripped my husband of everything.
They do not acknowledge him being there. I was blessed to get the headstone he rightfully deserved. No DD2 or any paperwork.
I have a paper stating an appointment to enlist the first time that's all.

Someone in law enforcement did some deep searching and could not come up with anything. Also someone at work knows someone who has connections and have heard nothing.

You can't get a headstone from the govt here unless they have proof a person served.

My husband was Special Forces. Which he told me.....and the headstone from Washington DC also says it.

One day I'll have a photo of the headstone in my book for the world to see. Someone will see it and may be able to help.

Taurus: He was 20 in 1971. I don't know what month he went in.
He tried he said when he got out of HS but that is when they would not accept him for medical reasons.

Something not quite right going on there,Deb. That reeks of deep secrecy.
My God,I would keep poking around and let them see you are not happy about it.

Wonder what other avenues you can explore.....Hmmm!

Joan xx

I've tried as much as I'm aware of.
Around 2008 our community had the Veteran's affairs of So. California book a room for a convention here. I was talking to the head of the organization. He could not help me when he got back.

Later I was told they have limited access.......the veteran affairs!

It's not like I'm asking for the world; I only want his DD2 that they did not allow him to have.....no records. I could not care less where he serviced in VN, who he was with or what he did.

Tom deserves even dead what's right.

ATouchofHeart wrote:I've tried as much as I'm aware of.
Around 2008 our community had the Veteran's affairs of So. California book a room for a convention here. I was talking to the head of the organization. He could not help me when he got back.

Later I was told they have limited access.......the veteran affairs!

It's not like I'm asking for the world; I only want his DD2 that they did not allow him to have.....no records. I could not care less where he serviced in VN, who he was with or what he did.

Tom deserves even dead what's right.

My heart goes out to you,Deb. Such unfairness and I would be just as angry as you.
To me that is betrayal.....

Big hugs,my friend......

Joan xx

Thank you (((((Joan))))).

I feel bad for Tom. Having to live all his adult life knowing that he gave for his country, killed for them adults and children he said and they won't even give him the time of day except for a kick in the pants.

They used him for the short time that they needed to retrieve the POW's then discarded him like he never existed.

I'm sure there have been some who were involved in this decision that have had to feel Tom's pain, abandonment, and unworthiness from their actions. We all have to judge ourselves when we cross over and feel the pain we have caused others.

Tom used to wake up in the middle of the night once in a while swinging and once yelled because he thought heard helicopters.
One time he swung at me while I was asleep. I knew he was dreaming because he never laid a hand on me in the 22 years we were married.

It's one of those coverups for many reasons.

We will survive we always do.

Deb,I wish my Ken had still been alive. If he had read this topic,he would have been straight onto this site and answered your post.

Would have given you all the support you needed plus advice.
I'm going to try and get in touch with a gent called Allan Murray who run the Australian Vets.Assoc. and see what he says.

Will be back later.....

Joan xx

Deb,is it just a widow's pension or a dependant pension through war?

Sweetie,keep on digging about that pension. Have you tried searching the internet for any information regarding the duties and work regarding bringing out prisoners from the country at war? Well,worth a go.
Stir ir up a little....

Joan....

Thank you Joan....
Widow's pension, my daughter is 33 years old.

No I have not searched that (regarding the duties and work regarding bringing out prisoners from the country at war)

I just know he was special forces.

Every time I inquire somewhere they delete records. Such a big secret.

Thank you Joan for your help.

ATouchofHeart wrote:Thank you Joan....
Widow's pension, my daughter is 33 years old.

No I have not searched that (regarding the duties and work regarding bringing out prisoners from the country at war)

I just know he was special forces.

Every time I inquire somewhere they delete records. Such a big secret.

Special Forces! That's the words I was looking for,Deb.

I can understand the secrecy involved in that kind of work but to refuse a war pension is just not on.
I feel for you so much,Deb.



Hugs,
Joan x

Thank you (((Joan))) I appreciate your heartfelt concerns.

If figure if it is to be it will be. From spirit Tom said not to give up.
He did bring me to that website 10 days now from the anniversary of his passing.

ATouchofHeart wrote:Thank you (((Joan))) I appreciate your heartfelt concerns.

If figure if it is to be it will be. From spirit Tom said not to give up.
He did bring me to that website 10 days now from the anniversary of his passing.

Have pm'd you Deb.

Deb, my dad's name was Tom and he passed on April 26, 1966 at 59. I thought that was young, but your Tom was a lot younger. He must have been higher up in the spirit realm. I read where once we have incarnated many times and learned the lessons we are sent here to learn, then we can choose to come back to help others learn their lessons if we want to and when we do that we can leave as soon as our job is finished. That could be why Tom was here. I'm sure you will all be together someday, you, Tom and Tommy. You are still here for an important reason and it could be your granddaughter to be!

Taurus20 wrote:Deb, my dad's name was Tom and he passed on April 26, 1966 at 59. I thought that was young, but your Tom was a lot younger. He must have been higher up in the spirit realm. I read where once we have incarnated many times and learned the lessons we are sent here to learn, then we can choose to come back to help others learn their lessons if we want to and when we do that we can leave as soon as our job is finished. That could be why Tom was here. I'm sure you will all be together someday, you, Tom and Tommy. You are still here for an important reason and it could be your granddaughter to be!

I do believe that Taurus about Tom.
Tom was 48.

I've been told I've had a lot of lives dying as a child.

I bought a book the other day titled Life after Life. It quite surprised me by saying we do reincarnate but only living one life many times over. The same life over and over again. We live that life until we follow the path exactly as we should. No taking wrong turns off it.

I felt a bit sick reading that....how boring would one life be,reliving it over again so many times?

I suppose that's how the pattern of our life goes,we make wrong turns or make wrong decisions so altering our life from the pattern it should have been.

Joan xx

Thank you Joan for sharing that. Reviews are great.

That does not make sense to me though.
"It quite surprised me by saying we do reincarnate but only living one life many times over".

I have been told of many lives I have lived and never been told of living the same life over and over again. That's a new one on me.

What I do believe is that if we don't learn a lesson in a lifetime that we must come back (free will though) to learn it again, different situations same lesson. May be many lives to learn one lesson.

ATouchofHeart wrote:Thank you Joan for sharing that. Reviews are great.

That does not make sense to me though.
"It quite surprised me by saying we do reincarnate but only living one life many times over".

I have been told of many lives I have lived and never been told of living the same life over and over again. That's a new one on me.

What I do believe is that if we don't learn a lesson in a lifetime that we must come back (free will though) to learn it again, different situations same lesson. May be many lives to learn one lesson.

That's what fascinated me. When I think back of the changes in my life and know how I should have lived life,for instance not marrying my first husband,(first marriage ended in divorce),and meeting my second husband earlier in life,things would have been so different. Maybe that is what I was meant to do....

Joan xxx

Maybe so Joan. I believe also that there are no accidents in our lives. Everything is in Divine Timing.