Three Reasons to Stop Spanking Kids
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Three Reasons to Stop Spanking Kids
Three Reasons to Stop Spanking Kids
September 22, 2013
by Dr. Luisa Bryce of "Harmony At Home"
Spanking. The age-old, forever controversial topic.
The question is always the same: Is it ok to hit your kids? I guess that really depends on your definition of “ok.” If by “ok,” you mean legal, then yes, at least in the state of Colorado. According to Colorado Law, parents are permitted to use means of physical punishment when disciplining their children so long as they do not leave injuries.
If by “ok” you mean morally correct, that’s up to you and your personal values and beliefs… no judgment here. But perhaps most importantly, if by “ok” you mean effective, as in your child will stop the behavior you’re punishing him for, then the answer is no.
Absolutely and affirmatively no. Spanking does not work to “punish out” the behaviors you don’t want… which leads me to my first point of reasoning:
1. Spanking doesn’t work. Dr. Alan Kazdin, one of the gurus of parenting, stated the following regarding spanking: “There is no need for corporal punishment based on the research. We are not giving up an effective technique. We are saying this is a horrible thing that does not work.” In a nutshell, spanking may stop bad behavior in the moment because kids are afraid of being hit, but it doesn’t work as a long-term solution because it reinforces violence and doesn’t teach or model desirable behavior.
2: Spanking can increase aggresive behavior. According to a 2011 study in Child Abuse and Neglect, children who were physically punished were more likely to resort to hitting as a way of resolving conflict with siblings and peers. Additionally, parents who endured spanking during their childhood were more likely to endorse spanking as acceptable and thus, spanked their children. Consequently, their children also accepted spanking as an appropriate way of discipline. And so lives on the intergenerational cycle of aggression and violent behavior.
3: Spanking doesn’t make you feel like a good parent. Some will argue this point, especially if your child is acting out royally and a good spanking causes her to shape up in a matter of seconds. But really, if you look inside yourself, is that truly the example you want to set for your kids? Spanking and other forms of physical punishment are such slippery slopes… they can become dangerous in a hurry because parents often increase the severity of the punishment if their child continues to be noncompliant.
The truth is this: effective discipline isn’t easy and quick, and even the best, most well-intended parents don’t keep it together all the time.
What is your experience?
September 22, 2013
by Dr. Luisa Bryce of "Harmony At Home"
Spanking. The age-old, forever controversial topic.
The question is always the same: Is it ok to hit your kids? I guess that really depends on your definition of “ok.” If by “ok,” you mean legal, then yes, at least in the state of Colorado. According to Colorado Law, parents are permitted to use means of physical punishment when disciplining their children so long as they do not leave injuries.
If by “ok” you mean morally correct, that’s up to you and your personal values and beliefs… no judgment here. But perhaps most importantly, if by “ok” you mean effective, as in your child will stop the behavior you’re punishing him for, then the answer is no.
Absolutely and affirmatively no. Spanking does not work to “punish out” the behaviors you don’t want… which leads me to my first point of reasoning:
1. Spanking doesn’t work. Dr. Alan Kazdin, one of the gurus of parenting, stated the following regarding spanking: “There is no need for corporal punishment based on the research. We are not giving up an effective technique. We are saying this is a horrible thing that does not work.” In a nutshell, spanking may stop bad behavior in the moment because kids are afraid of being hit, but it doesn’t work as a long-term solution because it reinforces violence and doesn’t teach or model desirable behavior.
2: Spanking can increase aggresive behavior. According to a 2011 study in Child Abuse and Neglect, children who were physically punished were more likely to resort to hitting as a way of resolving conflict with siblings and peers. Additionally, parents who endured spanking during their childhood were more likely to endorse spanking as acceptable and thus, spanked their children. Consequently, their children also accepted spanking as an appropriate way of discipline. And so lives on the intergenerational cycle of aggression and violent behavior.
3: Spanking doesn’t make you feel like a good parent. Some will argue this point, especially if your child is acting out royally and a good spanking causes her to shape up in a matter of seconds. But really, if you look inside yourself, is that truly the example you want to set for your kids? Spanking and other forms of physical punishment are such slippery slopes… they can become dangerous in a hurry because parents often increase the severity of the punishment if their child continues to be noncompliant.
The truth is this: effective discipline isn’t easy and quick, and even the best, most well-intended parents don’t keep it together all the time.
What is your experience?
skfarblum- Administrators
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Re: Three Reasons to Stop Spanking Kids
I find this totally bullshit. I see more and more of today's young people rude, crude, cussing like sailors and speaking to their parent's in a manner to which would have gotten me knocked toothless.
Now granted time out and a sharp scolding are wonderful forms of punishment for some children but for others it is abig joke.
Grounding them is effective for some..others just crawl on out the window. But some actually require a good ole fashioned spanking to get it . Respect is earned but it also must be taught. Responsibities at a young age builds character as opposed to so many young people I am witnessing who seem to have a crappy attitude and a sense of entitlement.
There is a huge difference in spanking a child. (A swat on the rear with a wooden spoon or the palm of a hand) then Beating a child. Beating or things like using tree switches is NOT acceptable .
Now granted time out and a sharp scolding are wonderful forms of punishment for some children but for others it is abig joke.
Grounding them is effective for some..others just crawl on out the window. But some actually require a good ole fashioned spanking to get it . Respect is earned but it also must be taught. Responsibities at a young age builds character as opposed to so many young people I am witnessing who seem to have a crappy attitude and a sense of entitlement.
There is a huge difference in spanking a child. (A swat on the rear with a wooden spoon or the palm of a hand) then Beating a child. Beating or things like using tree switches is NOT acceptable .
laura ann- Administrators
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Re: Three Reasons to Stop Spanking Kids
I find it very upsetting the behaviour of the younger generation.
I really am not sure if spanking or not spanking is really going to change
this.The reasons I suspect,and I am not going to be dogmatic about
it, goes much deeper and reflects a fundamental imbalance in our
modern world.The balance between the spiritual and the material has
tilted to much to the material.
Stephen
I really am not sure if spanking or not spanking is really going to change
this.The reasons I suspect,and I am not going to be dogmatic about
it, goes much deeper and reflects a fundamental imbalance in our
modern world.The balance between the spiritual and the material has
tilted to much to the material.
Stephen
skfarblums- Administrators
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Re: Three Reasons to Stop Spanking Kids
that is true as well....
to much electronics and not enough human and nature interaction.
People sit in restraunts and don't talk.. everyone has their nose in a stupid cell phone. Frankly they need to be banned in cars, restraunts etc.
to much electronics and not enough human and nature interaction.
People sit in restraunts and don't talk.. everyone has their nose in a stupid cell phone. Frankly they need to be banned in cars, restraunts etc.
laura ann- Administrators
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Re: Three Reasons to Stop Spanking Kids
I am so pleased that somebody else feels like I do.
Thanks
Thanks
skfarblums- Administrators
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Re: Three Reasons to Stop Spanking Kids
I believe everything is off balance right now....hence so much anger and hostility, wars, psycho's etc
the whole good versus evil (light vs dark) balance is leaning heavy to evil ( dark) at this time.
the thing is things can not stay unbalanced indefinately
the whole good versus evil (light vs dark) balance is leaning heavy to evil ( dark) at this time.
the thing is things can not stay unbalanced indefinately
laura ann- Administrators
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Re: Three Reasons to Stop Spanking Kids
Yes and I have been having very dark dreams.I mean by this dreams
of helplessness and sadness.I do not remember very clearly what I dream
but I awake with feelings of sadness.
I handle it by centering myself in my inner presence and thinking thoughts
of kindness,strength and faith in goodness.
Do you think there are waves
of influence which the earth passes through in its passage through the zodiac?
of helplessness and sadness.I do not remember very clearly what I dream
but I awake with feelings of sadness.
I handle it by centering myself in my inner presence and thinking thoughts
of kindness,strength and faith in goodness.
Do you think there are waves
of influence which the earth passes through in its passage through the zodiac?
skfarblums- Administrators
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Number of posts : 47
Age : 79
Location : kfar blum
Hobbies : mysticism,computers,reading
Tell us about yourself : mystic retiree
Appreciation Points : 83
Registration date : 2014-06-20
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